Does A Course in Miracles Teach That I Require a Holy Relationship in Order to Awaken?

I do want to ask you by what A Course in Miracles means by Holy Relationship. In one part of the book it talks about “entering the ark” together, and it almost sounds as though you will need an added specific person to be able to awaken. Therefore, I do believe I approach each new person with the expectation that maybe THIS might be the connection that reflects enlightenment to me, and I for them! Am I taking this too literally? Or do you really need another to help you awaken?

I appreciate your time so much and thanks for your help to me and others. I thanks and I thank God for you. Namaste.

David Hoffmeister: Thanks for your openness and your willingness to appear deeply at what is underneath these topics and issues. A Course in Miracles teaches that the split mind contains both the problem (the ego) and the Solution (the Holy Spirit). When they’re brought together, only One remains.

Your body and the entire world are usually the focus of ego’s perspective, for it seeks to create real problems and struggles in the world and to prevent the inner Healing Correction of the Holy Spirit. The ego’s distorted world is the merchandise of identity confusion acim free resources, an outpicturing of the belief that it’s possible to create an identity which God didn’t create. The ego is this identity problem and it absolutely was Answered or forgiven by the Holy Spirit the instant it did actually arise. This one problem might be described being an authority problem or even a confusion in who is the author of Reality. Your head that believes in the fact of the time-space cosmos has a control issue, for it believes so it can cause itself. This ego mind also thinks it’s in competition with God, although this really is pushed out of conscious awareness. This unconscious ego thought system is exposed in the A Course in Miracles Workbook lessons, and Lesson 13 contains a great example of the unveiling:

“A meaningless world engenders fear because I do believe I am in competition with God.”

This really is the beginning of training your head to forgive, for the focus is cut back to your head, back to thinking, and taken away from the body and the world. Anorexia, weight issues, body image issues, and interpersonal relationship issues are types of projection, of seeing the problem where it’s not: in the world. Your head cannot tolerate the belief in a battle with God, so this belief is pushed out of awareness. The deep-seated control issue such a belief entails is then projected to the body and the world. Weight control, like any attempt to manage the script or the body, is an attempt to manage the past. The Holy Spirit teaches that yesteryear can only be forgiven or released or regarded as false—not fixed or controlled or changed.

Exactly the same ego dynamic is underneath interpersonal relationship struggles of power and control, of wanting to repair or change an individual or even a self-image. Personal relationships might seem to sail happily along for awhile, yet the make-believe self-concept IS the private perspective and thus is definitely on shaky ground. Decisions are continuous. The Holy Spirit is just a decision. The ego is just a decision. Atonement is your decision that ends all decisions, an acceptance of the changelessness of Mind. The ego is your decision to believe that your head could be separate from God. Once your head believed so it had separated and built this time-space world, this time-space world of bodies became its substitute identity, since it believed it’d thrown away the Kingdom of Heaven. The world was made up as an alternative identity. The sleeping mind is split on your decision of identity. The Holy Spirit says, “This world is not Identity. This world can be an illusion.” And thus the Holy Spirit reminds your head constantly, “This world is not your Home. This world is not your Identity. This world is not real.” Whilst the mind is split it’s hearing another voice (the ego) that’s saying: “You’ve done it. You’ve separated from God. You’d better make the most effective of it and find something of the entire world to spot with. You can never return for God will punish you.”

Thought-form associations seem to become substitute identity. The ego mind appears to be identified with the body, with family, with environments that seem to surround it (i.e., I’m an American, Japanese, I’m male, I’m female, I’m from a wealthy family, from an undesirable family, I’m Catholic, Jewish, Protestant, etc.) Many of these are thought-form associations. And these seeming other persons and places surrounding the little personal self are all part of the construction. Your head is quite shaky about that small identity, this small self, this little me. So the little me is shaky, and it looks like other persons give the little me reality and importance (i.e., you’re my son, my daughter, you’re my boss, you’re a loving father, etc.) and all different items that these images appear to be telling this little me appear to be really important. Praise thus seems essential (i.e., you are an individual and you’re a good one!).

Praise and acceptance from others SEEM to stabilize this very shaky thing (i.e., you’re a good lover, you’re a good provider, you’re great with the children, you have an excellent intellect, you have such a heart, you help serve so many other folks, you’re a good team-player, on and on). This aspect of the self-concept says that you are an individual and you have most of these positive attributes that actually cause you to a valuable and worthy person, that produce you stand out above the crowd. You’re not only anyone—you’re somebody special. The flip side is criticism, which directly reflects the shaky sense of self. Criticism would be: you’re much less great as you believe you are, you’re not such a good team player, such a good provider, so good in bed—everything which can be taken as insults to the private self-concept). That’s the flip side of the strokes. To this ego self-concept that believes both parties (the positive and negative) of thinking are real, the Holy Spirit is perceived as a good threat, for the Holy Spirit contributes to the knowledge of forgiveness or the realization that none of the tiny images perceived as separate have any reality.

When the criticism seems in the future, the ego attempts a substitution. It thinks, “I don’t need this. I’ll go elsewhere and start other relationships with people who is able to appreciate my talents and skills and abilities, appreciate my personhood. I’ll avoid those negative influences in the world and those negative people. I’ll find someone else or join an organization where people are like-minded and forget about the remaining world. These new people will like me and stroke me and praise me.” The attempt at substitution is an attempt to maintain an expression of specialness, an expression of separation, an expression of individuality (a private mind with private thoughts). Those attempts are special love relationships. They seem to reinforce worth and value and to validate personhood. And they give you a false witness for clinging to the ego as identity. To the ego, past associations serve to provide personhood some sense of stability and consistency and value. Yet, the Holy Spirit shows that past associations offer nothing of value, for they were made by the ego to deny the facts of God’s Love.

Holy relationship emphasizes and reflects Content (right-minded thinking) and comes with an awareness of the meaninglessness of form. Whilst the ego’s believed relationships will appear to be specific, yet each one will present a way to release the belief in specifics. Divine Mind is Abstract and Universal. Forgiveness could be the bridge to the remembrance of Christ and God, Divine Abstraction. Thus the Holy Spirit teaches in A Course in Miracles:

“Whenever you meet anyone, remember it is just a holy encounter. As you see him you will see yourself. As you treat him you will treat yourself. As you consider him you will consider yourself. Remember this, for in him you may find yourself or lose yourself. Whenever two Sons of God meet, they’re given another chance at salvation. Do not leave anyone without giving salvation to him and receiving it yourself. For I am always there with you, in remembrance of you.

I do want to ask you by what A Course in Miracles means by Holy Relationship. In one part of the book it talks about “entering the ark” together, and it almost sounds as though you will need an added specific person to be able to awaken. Therefore, I do believe I approach each new…

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